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God Bless The Beatles

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Let that be an end to it...END TO IT!!!

There are some things that still rock on...but really shouldn't. Fads, fashions, expressions. Frankly, some of them died years ago but you'll always find that one rare, idiot still doing it. Some of these things are just tacky, other are annoying, and still others are flat out stupid. Don't be a victim a dead-beat ideas. Here are some tips from who other than the sexy Beatles...

*WARNING TO THOSE EASILY OFFENDED*
The following list is crude, insensative, rude but funny. So if you find something of yourself on this list, then...poo. You've been fore-warned...

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1) Girls getting a 'Beatle cut'. No no, dear. Your not a Beatle, stop trying to be one. You can show off your retro Beatle-side with a mod cut short or long but by getting a Beat-cut, your a chick in drag. We don't want that, do we? You'll see the sweeties in Beatlemania footage with bowl flips and shags. But NO Beatle cuts!

2) Stop calling yourselves 'hippies'. The generalization of hippies has gotten out-of-control and the fad should be bombed into the ground. I'm so sick to death of seeing these arrogant, naive pissy chicks wearing their hair long and a pair of slightly flared jeans with a freaking tie-dyed shirt and six sets of beads calling themselves HIPPIES. You wanna be a hippie? Heres a tip: become a vegan (meaning as well as no meat, no eggs, milk, butter, etc.), stop taking baths, stop wearing shoes, and get addicted to some hash. THEN we'll talk about whose a real hippie. But until then, your just another walking stereotype.

3) The '80s suck and we all know it. The next person who says 'Radical' DIES!!!

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4) The @ss-long pony tail / braid / crap-lock. Another big mistake. Whenever you see one of these 'I-wish-I-Was-An-Indian-But-I'll-Settle-For-A-Pilgrim' braided girls, don't you just wanna chop it off? Your not Pocha-freaking-hontus, unbraid that hair and cut off those 10 inches of split ends.

5) Hey everyone, its Mickey Mouse's 60th birthday! Let us all gather round and celebrate the birthday of AN IMAGINARY RAT by going to DISNEY WORLD and paying $60 for an adult pass (by the way, everyone 9 years old and up is considered an adult).

6) The Dollar Store. What the h-e-double hockeysticks are you doing in there? Its a crapfest compiled of 7 year old assorted lipsticks, expired candy (still wearing the same logo as from 1986), opened and used sun-tan lotion, fake greenery, no-brand-name dolls, and a rack of nasty unheard of chapsticks. Run, little girl, run while you still can.

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7) Thick, brightly colored eye-shadow going from your lid to your eyebrow. Can we say ugly-alla-Mimi?

8) Short, stubby nails that seem to look as if they grow in rather than out. A lot of guys have 'em, and they're even grosser on girls. They make your fingers look fat so to prevent this, grow your nails to a minimum of having a slim 'white part'.

9) One word/sentence emails. Whats the bloody point? You wanna write to someone, write to them! But if you only have one sentence to say, chances are, it can't be that intelligent or worth anyone's time.

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10) Psychic hotlines. Who REALLY calls those things? Do you honestly think that a woman wearing a colorful smock and bright red lipstick knows if your boyfriend is cheating on you? If your willing to pay her $2 a minute to tell you that eventually your going to die, ring me up and I'll make it $1.50.

11) Sick kids going to school. Get the frick outside! All these nasty, infectious viruses going around start by one stupid, sick kid who has to bring his epidemic with him. Stay home, get doped up on some Advil, and come the frick back!

12) The Goth Girl who doesn't really know what she's rebelling against. Another annoying type you have to deal with. The one that says their against the system and government, and hate their parents, power to the people. Then you ask them why and they are lost. Common follow-ups? 'Um...you wouldn't understand! Your too earthly like.' or the infamous 'I'm deep and your not.'

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13) The insecure b*tch-goddess. Every school has one. On the outside, she's naturally full of herself and hangs out in front of the mirror 24-7. She's snotty to everyone and acts like she's a princess. On the inside, she's more confused than the rest of us and hates herself. Get a freaking self-esteem, you cold hearted b*tch!

14) T-shirts with a 'cute' message on them, usually idolizing the self. These self-centered slogans come in many varieties. To name a few, avoid: Princess, Goddess, I love Me, Hottie, I make boys cry, Boys lie, 90% angel, Sexy, and my favorite Bow to me.

15) The following expressions suck. Yes, they suck. They suck so much I hate to even repeat them but if I didn't, you might still be saying them: Tight, sweet, dude, homie, ghetto-punk, beoch, yo, a'ight, and whatever.

16) Acid-faded denim skirts, jeans, or anything. Again, the '80s are dead and this country is still trying to forget them. Acid faded ANYTHING is just a grim reminder of one waste of a decade.